Wednesday, February 08, 2006; 5:43 AM;
im blogging twice. can you please read this? i need someone to listen to me. im scared. *SCREAMS!im starting to wonder what i will do if i dont get selected into e team. omg thats damn scary ok.my bro's very very very good friend didnt get into e soccer team while my bro did. and my bro's very sad because his friend is damn sad and im sad for e both of them. omg, what will happen if this happens to me?? omg i dread selection suddenly. ohman i dont wanna waste my golden year in cross!! i wanna make e best outta ohsix! my bro's friend had to go to rugby team because he clnt get into soccer team. i felt bloody sorry for him because he sacrificed his holis and wenta malaysia to play matches. omg then there were trngs and all, and he cldnt get into e team! my bro said e j1s who just came in and got into e team. but they dont even feel anything about it. OMFG i dont wanna go track so soon! its not too much about pandian's trngs, its about not being able to represent e sch in nats.what if e jnrs overtake me and take my place? i mean, of course i want e best for cross. but i'll be superduperultra depressed when i've trained for more than a year and cant get into team. ohmygawd i wont be able to stand that. ): i think i'll cry both my eyes and ass off. gawd someone save me. this pressure i cant stand. and these days i feel so weak my motivation is drying up soon, real soon. f-toot. i hate this. im not here to win sympathy. anyway its not like e most honourable thing to be slow. im just afraid i'll be damn sad and not being able to accept e harsh reality. i dont want that. ): ): i wanna run for nats. i want i want. ): ): ):
; ran